It takes most people about 30 seconds of being around me to realize I am comfortable with my blindness and about another 30 seconds to realize self-deprecating humor is a big part of my personality. Most people instinctively know that they are welcome to laugh along with my jokes and barbs. This is made especially easy when I work with youth as I did late last month at Camp Mo-Val which is located just outside of St. Louis, Mo. During the week at camp, I had the pleasure of meeting a pair of brothers, John and Adam, both of which were a huge part of why the week was so special. John is an 18 year old with amazing leadership abilities and shows a maturity far beyond his years. Johns little brother, Adam is 16 and was assigned to the cabin I was counseling. From the moment Adam and I were introduced, I had trouble figuring out where I stood with him. Id throw out jokes, but he wouldnt laugh. I would ask questions and Adam would give the shortest answer possible. While he was always polite, I couldnt figure out why he wasnt bouncing off the walls like the other young men in my cabin. I approached John with my concerns about his little brother and he assured me that Adam is just a very quiet person. Trust me, Marcus, hes running around with a big smile on his face! he explained. Good! I replied, I wasnt sure if I was doing something wrong. Quiet people usually dont exist to me, ya know?! John and I shared a laugh and I continued trying to make Adam feel comfortable enough to open up and joke around with me. Through the rest of the week, I made a special effort to be sure Adam really was having fun, but no matter how many jokes I would throw out, Adam hardly emitted an audible laugh. I took John at his word that Adam was having a good time, but without much feedback from Adam himself, I couldnt be 100% sure. During a conversation with John, I learned that Adam is a talented artist and musician. Adam and I had found our common love of music as we sat in the woods with guitars on our laps, but I was surprised to learn he also has a talent with oils, water colors and charcoals. When I learned of Adams talents with the visual arts, I got excited! For the last couple of years, Ive been searching for someone, preferably a friend, who would be willing to create some artwork for my home. Now, the perfect person had practically fallen into my lap! The next morning marked the final day of camp. As the campers were saying their good-byes, I asked Adam if hed be interested in creating some paintings for my home. Before Adam had a chance to answer, John leaned towards his brother and loudly whispered, Do a nude self portrait and well just tell him its a nice nature scene! When people come to his house, theyll ask why theres a picture of a naked dude hanging on his wall! Everyone standing around us laughed, including me, but what happened next absolutely shocked me! Adam, whos shyness had barely allowed him to speak more than two consecutive sentences all week broke out with, Nude, nothing! Im just going to give him a blank piece of canvas and charge him $500! I was speechless! This young man who had barely spoken all week was, in his own quiet way, slowly becoming so comfortable with me that he felt he could break out the playful insults. I couldnt have been happier! As John and Adam climbed into their car to return home, I had the biggest grin of the week plastered across my face just knowing that my goal had been accomplished! Lessons learned at camp: Everyone processes information in their own way. Just because Adam hadnt been the boisterous and outspoken one of our cabin didnt mean he wasnt having fun which is, of course, the ultimate goal of going to camp. In my role as a counselor, my mission has been accomplished when my group is laughing, playing and having the best time of their life. Hang around a group of young men and youll soon realize that we show affection for our friends by teases and insults. Adams barb, in addition to being the best blind joke Id heard in a while, showed that the reserved young man Id fretted over all week was, in fact, having the time of his life. That one small comment showcased the breakthrough Id been looking for! Take time to notice the little breakthroughs of your mission. The skies do not have to open and fireworks rain down for you to notice you have accomplished your goal. Sometimes, just the quiet exclaimation from an unlikely source means more than all the accolades in the world. |
