This is a very common problem for many of us. Getting dumped hurts a lot. But one wants to go back to good life as early as possible, if for nothing than to forget the earlier pain. But since the pain remains and the thought of being hit again is overwhelming, it becomes difficult to decide.
When should one go back to dating scene after getting dumped? The answer for this question will vary from individual to individual. If your earlier partnership lasted for few months, you can recover sooner, but if the earlier partnership lasted for some years, it takes a lot more time to get prepared mentally to go back to the dating scene. The old wounds take a lot more time to heal, and sometimes they may never heal. If at this point of time, you manage to get a dating partner who understands and helps you come out of the memories, you are very lucky.
When you seriously date someone, you get involved. You plan for the future and you are recognized as a regular date of that person amongst your friends. You also give your trust to that person. You care for him/her and make many sacrifices to keep the relationship going. You dream of a bright future ahead and even make every move with consultation. This makes you both very involved with each other. If at this point, you are dumped, you will take lot of healing to come over the bitterness. You might have lost your faith in the opposite sex. So what is to be done?
Involve yourself with your work. Take up a new hobby. Make new friends. Join a club. Go around and enjoy the nature. And whenever you feel the pain of earlier love, feel it intensely. It does not help to push those feelings behind. They will remain there to resurface again. So feel every pain and cry over the loss if necessary. Express the anger and the bitterness. Cleanse yourself as much as possible of the memories.
After you are sure that you have regained your emotional stability, go back to the dating scene. If you find some one interesting with understanding, tell all after few meetings and ask for help and love in return of love. God willing, you will get it. |
